Sideways

Here are some interesting facts about wine after the film “Sideways” was released:

“Throughout the film, Miles speaks fondly of the red wine varietal Pinot noir, while denigrating Merlot. After the film’s U.S. release in October 2004, Merlot sales dropped 2% while Pinot noir sales increased 16% in the Western United States. Other reports claimed that sales of Merlot dropped after the film’s release. A 2009 study by Sonoma State University found that ‘Sideways’ slowed the growth in Merlot sales volume and caused its price to fall, but the film’s main effect on the wine industry was a rise in the sales volume and price of Pinot noir, and in overall wine consumption.”

The cast of Sideways (largest to smallest): Miles Raymond sniffing his wine while plugging his ear, Jack Cole, broken nose and clearly in disgrace…let’s face it, anyone wearing a bandage and a bedspread is clearly up to no good; Maya Randall the waitress and Stephanie, who had beaten up Jack with her motorcycle helmet but she’s got a good reason to. What’s the fifth doll? Why it’s a bottle of Belle Glos wine, which is not featured in the film, but a representation of the buyer’s husband’s favorite inebriant.

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Daniel Zalkus’ Charcoal and Whisky

I totally believe that when the Great Organizer of the Universe hands you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, you better grab it and run with it. That’s exactly what my friend and former colleague Dan Zalkus did when Glenfiddich came a-knockin’. He was an artist in residence at the Glenfiddich Distillery in Scotland for a few months, doing nothing but knocking back endless shots of whiskeys and drawing. The fruits of his labor resulted in a show at the distillery AND a wonderful picture book of the daily going ons there.

Flipping through this book reminds me of my own trips to Scotland oh so many years ago. Although I’m not a strict whiskey drinker, I do recall ordering a number of them there since my coat wasn’t doing sufficient enough a job keeping me warm while looking for the wee Nessie at Inverness.

Dan’s able to capture the movements of the distillery workers with his impeccable style by showing up every day with his charcoal pencil and drawing board. It’s not a bad way to spend three months of your life, is it?

When I got his book in the mail, it went right up in a place of honor…right next to our very own Glenfiddich bottle! This is one book that should not be shelved!

The Pastry Chef

For someone who’s obsessed with food and miniatures and miniature foods, Re-ment is a godsend. Well, not really, since collecting it can burn a serious hole in one’s pocket. I was able to amass a serious collection a few years back and am now the proud owner of many hard-to-find and discontinued sets. Unfortunately, I have collected so much that it required multiple shipments for me to transport it all to Oz from the US (my parents simply gave me this look when I suggested that they send it to me bi-monthly), so I only have a few sets here at my disposal.

Luckily, I had the foresight to bring fourth my entire cakes and bakery collection so I was able to do this:

I know, I know, I should use my free time more constructively…like maybe figure out how to stop the ants from coming in and dying in my bathroom.

I’ve Got a Golden Ticket

It’s a no-brainer which version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory to paint…the original, of course!

Clockwise from left: Augustus Gloop, Violet Beauregarde, Willy Wonka, Veruca Salt, an Oompa Loompa, Charlie Bucket, and Mike Teavee.

Wonka with an Everlasting Gobstopper and Augustus Gloop with not one but two Wonka bars.

Violet Beauregarde just before turning into a blueberry and Veruca Salt in the midst of a temper tantrum.

Mike Teavee in all his spaghetti western movie glory and Charlie Bucket with his golden ticket!

And of course the Oompa Loompa! He’s mainly the reason why I went with the classic version and not Tim Burton’s. Nothing against the re-make, but I love my Oompa Loompas with orange faces and green hair and those kicky overalls.

A Fear Factor Birthday Treat

It all started out as a joke. A customer sent me a photograph of a cake shaped like a cockroach because that’s the kind of stuff she does. After I stopped laughing, I passed it on to a friend a told her it would be funny to present something like it for the hubs’ birthday, as Anthony is deathly afraid of the itty bitty vermin. Honestly, we’re talking about a man who has faced crocs and sharks on a regular basis whilst on his kayaking expeditions yet he’d scream for me to come and kill the roaches. I can’t tell you how many time he’s run out of the house and wouldn’t come in till I got rid of it.

As luck would have it, my friend Kristy actually knew an award-winning cake maker who made it happen. I can’t say the roach has cured the hubs of his fears, but he can safely say that he’s had himself a birthday—fear-factor style—by eating a cockroach!

Come on, a cake like this can’t be bought from ANY shop! When it was unveiled we basically just stood around and stared at it, our mouths open. No one can work fondant like the fabulous Debbie Crispin.

We didn’t even bother with candles or the birthday song. The cake absolutely overwhelmed us.

This was another cake Debbie has made earlier for Kristy’s daughter Charlie’s fairy themed birthday. Yes, that’s a full miniature tea set and cake on the toadstool table. There was a debate then whether or not the cake should be cut up, but with eight little girls hopped up on sugar and wanting more, Kristy had no choice…although she did manage to salvage the entire tea set and the woodland critters! We didn’t have much problem cutting up the roach cake…as it was chocolate and it’s been a whole month since I had any sugar based product and I was itching to have a go at it!

Thanks, Debbie! You rock! It’s a joy to have someone as talented as you to be a part of our special days.

Bread Deconstructed

It’s occurred to me that the walls in my unit was shamefully barren so I devoted a week to doing something about it.

I mentioned once that I was a bit obsessed about putting everything in chart forms. That was a bit of an occupational hazard as teachers were forever telling their pupils to deconstruct the world around them in chart form. It eventually rubbed off on me.

I’d meant to do this series about 15 years ago and finally got around to getting it done. If I’m not the Queen of Procrastination, I don’t know who is.

Another Mini Cupcake Pageant

I couldn’t help myself! I love cupcakes and I love glitter! I recently got my little hands on several bottles of Martha Stewart’s glitter and after much deliberation, I decided to combine my two passions!

These gals competing for the Little Miss Cupcake Pageant have done it again! It’s obvious that Miss Mango Parfait Cupcake is the front runner from the beginning. You can’t miss her cupcake…nor her outrageously orange gown from the start. Is it any wonder she got the coveted Cupcake Trophy?

But the two runner ups: Miss Key Lime Cupcake and Miss Cherry Chocolate Cupcake, are nothing to sneeze at either. Although they haven’t got the top honor, the loss will be sure to send them back into the kitchen, bettering their cupcake recipes for the next pageant!

Body By BoBo BaBushka

Ever wonder how you can achieve that lovable nesting doll shape? Well, wonder no more! Here are three easy steps to procure and maintain this glorious figure!

Step 1: Eating right is essential. BoBo BaBushka recommends a high-calorie, high carb, high sodium, high fat, all-sugar and grease street fair diet. Corn dogs, candied apples, chicken kabobs, mozzarepa, funnel cakes, corn with mayo on it…just to name a few. You can wash it all down with the saccharine sweet lemonade and enjoy a sno-cone topped with extra syrup for dessert.

Step 2: Low impact exercise. High impact exercise regiments will not help you achieve the nesting doll figure. But BoBo BaBushka has figured out a way to aid those who are exercise-conscious. A walk from the couch to the refrigerator is just the kind of exercise that will both help your cause AND give your heart rate a little boost. Don’t forget to rehydrate before and after these walks with a refreshing beverage such as a 32 oz. Crush.

Step 3: Get lots of Z’s. Do not overlook the power of sleep! BoBo BaBushka recommends 10-14 hours of sleep daily, supplemented by frequent naps.

By applying these 3 easy steps to your daily routine, you, too, can have a nesting doll body in no time!

Every Day Should Be Mother’s Day

I feel a little bad that I haven’t given my Mom any dolls yet. But there’s a good reason: I need to make one that is perfect for her. I’m not sure how things work in the Creativity Department of my brain. I find that, over the years, it’s best if I wait docilely for an inspiration. Fortunately, this year it deigned to give me just the doll to give to Mom—and in time for Mother’s Day! I have to admit that perhaps this idea isn’t all from the Creativity Department. Mom helped too…by trying out all the recipes in a cookbook probably called Simply Chiffon…and bombarding me with every flavor of chiffon cakes at all hours of the day…and night! Since this is a gift for a woman who once suggested I have a 3-layer chocolate torte for dinner…cake it is!

This single bottle holder babushka doll can house the perfect dessert wine to go with the cakes…or better yet, a bottle of pure vanilla extract!

I love sprinkles, and I love glitter…you know where this is leading up to!

“My mom is literally a part of me. You can’t say that about many people except relatives, and organ donors.”
– Carrie Latet

Happy Mother’s Day!

Hansel and Gretel

It’s been a year and a few short months since I started this babushka project, and wouldn’t you know it, I have now painted my 100th set! To commemorate this momentous event, I have decided to revisit an old favorite: The story of Hansel and Gretel. It’s got everything, wouldn’t you say? Children in peril, cruel adults, cannibalism, feminist movement (Gretel’s quick thinking deserves a shout-out), and cookies and cakes galore!

In lieu of the traditional gingerbread walls, I decided to go with something a little lighter: Wafers!

The “invisible wall” gives you a glimpse into the witch’s domicile. The table full of goodies is also a cage for her future meals.

I found something amazing while prowling around my favorite paper shop here in NYC: Martha Stewart Crafts Luster Glass Microbeads. They act as glitter, but, they’re these nano-sized beads which reminded me so much of those Black/raspberry jels that I had to incorporate them into this set.

The witch with her strawberry cake skirt, Hansel stuffing his face full of candies, and Gretel, looking none too happy with her bucket and mop.

It wasn’t easy painting this set. I must’ve gained 5 pounds because every so often, I’d have to tuck into the candy dish filled with chocolates and gummy bears!