Oktoberfest

Are you ready for 16 days of pure, unadulterated fun? If so, join Herr Helmudt, Frau Shnitzen, and Otto for a couple of pints and some Brezeln (pretzel) right here in the heart of Munich!

The object goal at Oktoberfest is to eat, drink and be merry!

(Left to right) Herr Helmudt, Frau Schnitzen, and Otto.

A close up of Helmudt’s lederhosen. Notice that his family crest is none other than a pretzel.

Belly Dancin’

“Egyptian dancers glisten, Turkish dancers sweat.” —Anonymous

These girls certainly do a little bit of both!

Roller Girls

You probably don’t expect the president of the PTA, your yoga instructor, or even the lady who refills your Halcyon prescription to have a double life, but they do. By day these ladies are urbane, educated, and possibly the first in line to volunteer for the church bake sale.

But by night, they are ruthless, merciless, and downright savage.

Meet Doomsday Dolly, Go Go Guillotine, and Vile Venus—the girls on wheels who are hell-bent on destryoing all who stand in their way…on the track, that is.

G'day Mateys!

It’s been nine months since I’ve started the matryoshka project and I have now completed my 50th set! Granted, I cheated a little by painting just a double this time, but Anthony is to blame for this since he won’t let me get a helper monkey for me to work in the third doll.

I’ve decided, in order to celebrate the completion of the 50th set, to paint Anthony and myself hanging out right here on the Gold Coast. Anthony is in his full-on kayaking expedition gear (minus the GPS, but he does have his sat phone on him) and I, with a band-aided knee, in my not-the-least-bit-professional bike wear (bonus points to those of you who recognize the artist who did the original graphic on my shirt. Hint: He used to hang out with Andy Warhol back in the 80’s).

And yes! That IS a Nutcase helmet. You can get the real thing at http://www.nutcasehelmets.com (.au for those of you on this side of the world).

Since Anthony’s always going on about the time when a croc tried to take a bite out of his kayak, I figured it would be fun to include a mini one trying to have a go at his pelican case.

Couch Potatoes

I’ve always told my prospective suitors that if I have to choose between them and TV, I will inevitably opt for the boob tube. This is simply for the fact that you can always turn off the set when it gets too annoying or, god forbid, wants to “talk.”

Of course I had to include a bulldog into the mix. They ARE the couch potatoes of the canine world.

A comfy chair is not comfy without the requisite crochet blanket.

This is my ultimate tribute to the one friend who has seen me through the thick and thin: The wonderful TeeVee Set.

Want Fries With That?

I found my old ipod the other day and decide to give it a listen. When I was packing up to move to Oz, I had to get rid of thousands of beloved CDs after downloading its contents into my itunes library.

One of the songs that I haven’t listened to since college was Tori Amos’ “Waitress” wherein she professed a desire to send one to kingdom come. Surly waitresses come with fries, doesn’t Tori know that?

Maud, Bernice and Crystal get the job done (although you might find a menthols cigarette butt ground absentmindedly into your mashed potatoes or a couple of bubblegums hardening under your table).

See You at the Chapel!

With all the talks of engagements and weddings all around me, I felt obliged to dash off a set of a couple headed to the chapel accompanied by their flower girl.

Rocker Chic

This is a throw back to my old clubbing days in venues so small you had to squeeze past the lead singer in order to get to the bathroom. Although I’ve seen many male-oriented bands (my favorite remains to be Rhinocervs), I would usually make a special point of putting down my beer whenever a girl group comes up. It seemed like they just make more of an effort in terms of presentation.

And I’ll tell you this: No one can rock “The Immigrant Song” like those fabulous gals in Lez Zeppelin.

Arbor Day

It’s a bit late to celebrate the Australian Arbor Day (July 20th) and too early for the American one, but with the arrival of spring, I can’t help but think about the Day of Trees.

Here’s to Arbor Day, albeit a bit too late (or a bit too early).

Ink'd

Tip for those about to get ink’d:

It’s important to really think about what you want on your skin before making an appointment. This is crucial because it keeps you from coming out of the tattoo parlor wearing a Warner Bros character in homeboy pants or Chinese symbols loosely translate to “androgynous dumplings.”

I name her Jean-It after a friend, who also happens to be a tattoo enthusiast.

Some details…

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1. The dahlia peeking out of Jean-It’s left bra is part of the full sleeve my friend is planning to have inked in real life. This is a (tiny) sneak peek of the finished product. And of course I had to have the tops of her name put on the doll as well! On her right leg is the US Constitution and her left is the Iwo Jima Memorial.

2. I always loved New Hampshire’s state motto: Live Free or Die. Unfortunately, I forgot the “to die” part.

3. I love themed tattoos. If you haven’t guessed by now, Little Jean-It is extremely patriotic. Painting Mt. Rushmore was all sorts of fun. It was sort of a dare to myself if I can execute it in such a tiny scale. This doll, mind, is only 4 inches tall. On her arm is a full sleeve of Blind Justice.

4. Here you can see the Battleship Missouri and a part of the portrait of Little Jean-It’s grandfather (way on the right of the leg). On her arm is a full sleeve tat of Lady Liberty.

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Leon loves the ladies, his momma, and the Virgin Mary. His tats are a dedication to all the special women in his life.

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1. On the top of the skull, in itty bitty letters, are the words “Hopeless Romantic” written in Spanish. He is holding a beer in a stubbie cooler I modeled after Anthony’s own from South Mole Island. On his arm is the ever-lasting “Mom” tat and a portrait bearing the name of my bestie Po’Trowski.

2. On his back is a full-on tat of Virgin Mary, the mother of all mothers.

3. Leon’s portrait of his momma, Beatrice Mae.

4. A full portrait of his latest lady-love, whom I modeled after the same bestie, but with her first name on the banner. The portrait, unfortunately, does not do her justice since the doll is just two-and-a-half inches tall. On his arm are names of his past ladies, each of them crossed out.

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Kandie is all about rock n’ roll. She grew up a few decades too late to groove out to Jefferson Airplane and Strawberry Alarm Clock, But thanks to her Dad’s immense record collection, this retro-chic rocker chick not only knows who Jimi Hendrix is, but her tats make all sorts of cliché images of dead rock stars fashionable again.

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1. On her boob is a portrait of Janis Joplin with the words “Love, Janis” on the bottom.

2. When I first started on these dolls, I had no definite idea what Kandie’s tattoo theme should be, but I knew I had to include a little upright piano. Everything just sort of evolved from there.

3. Her raised arm shows a full sleeve of a guitar and some abstract musical notes. There’s a metronome on her torso and a cassette tape on her thigh.

4. Jimi Hendrix is on her arm, an old school mic on her torso. If you can’t guess what those little figures on her thigh are supposed to be, then I have truly failed as a wanna-be tattoo artist.