When I used to pull all-nighters back in those good ol’ uni days, I relied on late night television programming to keep me from going insane. Now, watching TV late at night (especially when you have sub-basic cable like I did) could really mess with your head. I remembered receiving several shipments of Thighmasters and Chia Pets and wondered where it all came from. But late night TV wasn’t all bad. Especially when Joe Bob Briggs’ “Monstervision” was on. This man would host a series of atrociously bad B-horror movies and would sum up each film with his “drive-in totals,” a list of what he thought were the high points of the films. It went something along the lines of: Eight corpses. Pig calling. Fainting. Chest shaving. Bullwhip cracking. One untethered wangdoodle. Bimbo-flinging. Dwarf tossing. Ten breasts. Four stars. Check it out. He was a brilliant man.
Anyway, while I was at home in New York I managed to locate my stash of video tapes, some featured “Monstervision” movies, but a lot of it were from my past obsession with films of school girls bent on raising a little hell. Literally. I had Satan’s School for Girls, Don’t Deliver Us from Evil, The Initiation of Sarah, Midnight Offerings, Summer of Fear, etc. Boy, that was a healthy collection of movies, wasn’t it? It did, however, inspire me to come up with this set:
Did you ever notice a lot of these movies featured girls who practiced demonology were enrolled in Catholic or other ecclesiastical institutions?